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You know, I didn't want to get into this whole religious argument, not around this time of year, Easter, when half of the remaining Christians I know have decided to give up cigarettes or alcohol for lint: they are dangerous people.  But I'm at this party and this bubble-head-bleech-blond with a tangling Jesus-cross earring ask me:  "Why don't you give us our Holiday."

She was talking about Easter.

"Well," I said, "I just don't get why you people continue to worship that myth when you know it's not true.  Jesus never rose from the dead on Easter, it's a common fact that this is the Spring Equinox celebration... everyone knows that."

"So what if it is a myth... Jesus was a great man."

And that, Children, is where their faith is today: they know it's a lie, but so what: he was a great man.

Dare I tell her that there is no historic record of Jesus?  There are a ton of reference to Casear, but to date, none of a man called Jesus until around the year 200 when the church had made it impossible to get a job without acting like you believed.

Cut the shit.

Let's get on with the real spirituality, whatever it is.  Stop dealing me myths, bitch (I don't think I said "bitch," but I really wanted to... then again, she was my mom.

Grow up.  

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