The pizza guy flirted with her last night.
He drove up-and-down the street three times before delivering his goods.
He said he couldn't find the place because the lights weren't on.
That never stopped him before.
I almost got so pissed I stood up from behind the hedges to scream: "Liar. Liar. Donald Trump LIAR!"
But I didn't want to blow my cover.
You see, she doesn't know I love her.
She really doesn't even know I exist.
But, she will.
I got this job delivering pizza... in the Trump administration.
I got fired today. No big deal. I never liked her anyways.
Author's Translation: the segment you just read is my interpretation of Donald Trump's America. The pizza is freedom. The unsuspecting woman, justice. The pizza delivery guy, James Comey, former Director of the Federal Bureau of Investigation. The psycho liar, Donald Trump.
Donald Trump, the man who was going to make American Great Again, instead, makes it stink like spoiled ham at a bar mitzvah.