Being a Scorpio, a child of Pluto if you will, this NASA space probe that is about to snap photos of me is precocious to say the very least. Left alone all these years, you now want to orbit me, and I dare say I’m not ready. Yes, I’m shy and well, still a little sensitive from having been downgraded from a "planet" to a “dwarf.” Is that even politically correct to say? I guess it is better than being called a rock and removed from the astronomical map altogether. I’m shocked you want to have a look at me at all. Obviously I don’t like attention or I wouldn’t reside so far away from the sun. Yes, I am the observer who is now being observed and not sure I like it. Why? You will soon see, you and your probing tools. And so I ask: what is it you wish to see? What is it you need to know? I’m the gatekeeper, this will surprise you. And, as you will soon find out, I have ports, pathways, and moons, and if you get close enough, you may even find out I have a pulse.
It’s cold out here, as you will see. Cold and dark. Particles of nowhere.